Mr D, for finding a solution that was so easy that nobody before thought of it :-)
Special mention for J who then finished it off.
You know.. today I thought that you don't really have to know or be able to do anything as long as you know who can!
I have wasted so much of my time trying to do things I have absolutely no talent for (but could achieve by mere tenacity) when people I know do it in 5 minutes flat!
Doesn't mean to say I will never try and achieve anything again but today when I was not feeling to productive (since it was Friday and I had overdone it the rest of the week of course) I thought it was allowed.
And now.. it is weekend.. tomorrow morning THE hairdresser visit and then P A R T Y
Well.... that can only be an anti climax after all that build up :)
Friday, March 31, 2006
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
Light at the end of the tunnel?
Who knows...
I am always terrified of imposing on people so try to be pretty much on my own. Also I am very lazy at heart and the couch, laptop, television and cuddling Johns feet is a great combination. Who needs a social life anyway!
But... I lack social interaction.. in my past I was working with long term unemployed people, asking them about their life story and see if I could find links to the real world and devise a career path with them sending them to appropriate courses, education etc. Sometimes it was really depressing because so many people are not happy with their life but are actually not motivated enough to change anything.
Sometimes it was lovely though, I have had people giving me messages through ex colleagues saying that I saved their lives because they went to particular courses and found a proper job, sometimes for the first time in their lives.
Apart from that I was hired as 'supervisor' for the Rotterdam college for human resource management and labour mediation. This meant I had to have weekly sessions with 3 students in this field and talk about their behaviour at work and the feedback they got and how they can improve their attitude and guide them through a process of 'how to become a professional HR manager'.
So much fun.. confronting them with their beliefs, helping them to form opinions and take positions on what sort of professional they want to be.. basically forming them.
Also giving class room training in 'presentation skills' and other 'soft' stuff like communication training. So lovely to see them improve and hear that they want to be you when they finish. :-)
And here I am, different country, different job.
It feels like in the years before I went to Scotland I have used up all my social interactions in one fair swoop since I don't seem to have any at all!
I mean, don't get me wrong, I love John to absolute bits but as an individual I need more interaction and share things with other people... 'flow' with them.
I suppose because I have always got that from my work I was initially thinking of changing jobs again but ... today I thought.. maybe I should do it differently this time... maybe.. I should think of starting to do something social outside of the house and workplace.
Shock horror!!
I know why I never thought of that, it is the 'single mum' syndrome, it is just too much hassle to find a sitter for the evening you want to go out but since my darling boy is now almost 21 AND lives in Holland I think he is ok with me going out :-)
So..
always wanted to go to dance classes again.. when I was really young (16 :-)) I was quite OK at ballroom and latin dancing and all these programs on telly makes me want to do it even more. Mind you I don't want to be lifted at any point ever but having a nice dance on great music.. can't wait..
Apparently it IS possible, even in Greenock, and I have vowed to pursue this and see if I can combine healthy exercise with new contacts, who knows.... watch this space, I am in danger of really having something to talk about.
:-)
I am always terrified of imposing on people so try to be pretty much on my own. Also I am very lazy at heart and the couch, laptop, television and cuddling Johns feet is a great combination. Who needs a social life anyway!
But... I lack social interaction.. in my past I was working with long term unemployed people, asking them about their life story and see if I could find links to the real world and devise a career path with them sending them to appropriate courses, education etc. Sometimes it was really depressing because so many people are not happy with their life but are actually not motivated enough to change anything.
Sometimes it was lovely though, I have had people giving me messages through ex colleagues saying that I saved their lives because they went to particular courses and found a proper job, sometimes for the first time in their lives.
Apart from that I was hired as 'supervisor' for the Rotterdam college for human resource management and labour mediation. This meant I had to have weekly sessions with 3 students in this field and talk about their behaviour at work and the feedback they got and how they can improve their attitude and guide them through a process of 'how to become a professional HR manager'.
So much fun.. confronting them with their beliefs, helping them to form opinions and take positions on what sort of professional they want to be.. basically forming them.
Also giving class room training in 'presentation skills' and other 'soft' stuff like communication training. So lovely to see them improve and hear that they want to be you when they finish. :-)
And here I am, different country, different job.
It feels like in the years before I went to Scotland I have used up all my social interactions in one fair swoop since I don't seem to have any at all!
I mean, don't get me wrong, I love John to absolute bits but as an individual I need more interaction and share things with other people... 'flow' with them.
I suppose because I have always got that from my work I was initially thinking of changing jobs again but ... today I thought.. maybe I should do it differently this time... maybe.. I should think of starting to do something social outside of the house and workplace.
Shock horror!!
I know why I never thought of that, it is the 'single mum' syndrome, it is just too much hassle to find a sitter for the evening you want to go out but since my darling boy is now almost 21 AND lives in Holland I think he is ok with me going out :-)
So..
always wanted to go to dance classes again.. when I was really young (16 :-)) I was quite OK at ballroom and latin dancing and all these programs on telly makes me want to do it even more. Mind you I don't want to be lifted at any point ever but having a nice dance on great music.. can't wait..
Apparently it IS possible, even in Greenock, and I have vowed to pursue this and see if I can combine healthy exercise with new contacts, who knows.... watch this space, I am in danger of really having something to talk about.
:-)
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
Gratitude
Goodness.. been so busy again today!
And just when I was about to have a nice moan about that my mind flew back to the first months I worked for BAC.
Every day from 8 till 17 I was sitting on an office chair 'on the phones' (which means wearing a headset connected to a telephone device) creating service requests for BAC's customers.
This means literally that you need to sit on that chair until it is time for your official and planned 15 minute break, your 60 minute lunch or 15 minute afternoon break until it is time to go home. YAY! It also means that if you are desperate for a wee because of healthy drinking of 2 litre water a day you need to check if someone else is 'covering the line' and if you are not back in 2 minutes you get angry glances from your colleagues.
It was fun though, I like the dynamics of being in one space with about 500 other people and the hustle and bustle really attracts me. It didn't stay fun for long :) - boredom kicks in pretty fast, luckily I got to do more exciting things.
But.. I never forget how I looked at those other members of the call centre, the ones that had been there a bit longer, the ones that got to walk around the centre looking like they owned it. Knowing everybody and knowing how to get things done and most importantly carrying their own laptop.
It was immediately clear that that was the pecking order. OK, it was nice to become a trainer for your team or even a team leader but everybody knew that the next step was 'getting a laptop'. I even once had a teamleader who bought his own version and got it set up with BACs software just to pretend he was on the next step. Little did he know that we all knew that he would never reach that step :-)
Anyway... those 'laptoppers' were perceived to be top of the bunch.
I discovered that there was even a next step when I heard a BACcer talk about 'yeah I am working from home today can you connect me to the US' I was so impressed. Not only because of the fact that he wanted to talk to someone in the US which sounded way far away (being used to working for the local job centre in Holland and never ventured further than the UK), but I was even more impressed because he said 'I am working from home'.
I had read about people 'working from home' but I always sort of had this idea that those were selfemployed people, it felt soooo out of reach.
So... here I am.. I have been promoted to laptopper AND work from home AND talk to the US and loads of other geographies on a regular basis and still moan?
Shame on me!!
And just when I was about to have a nice moan about that my mind flew back to the first months I worked for BAC.
Every day from 8 till 17 I was sitting on an office chair 'on the phones' (which means wearing a headset connected to a telephone device) creating service requests for BAC's customers.
This means literally that you need to sit on that chair until it is time for your official and planned 15 minute break, your 60 minute lunch or 15 minute afternoon break until it is time to go home. YAY! It also means that if you are desperate for a wee because of healthy drinking of 2 litre water a day you need to check if someone else is 'covering the line' and if you are not back in 2 minutes you get angry glances from your colleagues.
It was fun though, I like the dynamics of being in one space with about 500 other people and the hustle and bustle really attracts me. It didn't stay fun for long :) - boredom kicks in pretty fast, luckily I got to do more exciting things.
But.. I never forget how I looked at those other members of the call centre, the ones that had been there a bit longer, the ones that got to walk around the centre looking like they owned it. Knowing everybody and knowing how to get things done and most importantly carrying their own laptop.
It was immediately clear that that was the pecking order. OK, it was nice to become a trainer for your team or even a team leader but everybody knew that the next step was 'getting a laptop'. I even once had a teamleader who bought his own version and got it set up with BACs software just to pretend he was on the next step. Little did he know that we all knew that he would never reach that step :-)
Anyway... those 'laptoppers' were perceived to be top of the bunch.
I discovered that there was even a next step when I heard a BACcer talk about 'yeah I am working from home today can you connect me to the US' I was so impressed. Not only because of the fact that he wanted to talk to someone in the US which sounded way far away (being used to working for the local job centre in Holland and never ventured further than the UK), but I was even more impressed because he said 'I am working from home'.
I had read about people 'working from home' but I always sort of had this idea that those were selfemployed people, it felt soooo out of reach.
So... here I am.. I have been promoted to laptopper AND work from home AND talk to the US and loads of other geographies on a regular basis and still moan?
Shame on me!!
Monday, March 27, 2006
Bubblet
Phew... I have been BUSY today.
Shock horror!
Some lunatics have cocked something up so badly that it is now up to me to make it better (at work that is) and it will take me a few days to get on top of that.
Apart from that we bought some new stuff to put on eBay which keeps me busy in the time I do not try and fix other peoples mistakes.
So now.. 21:50 ... it is time.. for a tad of Bubblet... do you know it?
It is the most lovely shareware ever made I think... I went through spades (spates?) of Tetris and Bejeweled and all that sort of very nervy games but they just agitated me.. at this time of night I want to do something very light and dull, not to excited to just get my brain back into a normal gear.
Something to do with A and B flows I think? Have you heard of that, that if you are in a state of sort of hypnosis that another part of your brain gets a chance to come to the forefront? Well, I don't know the technicalities of it but it works for me.. if one part of my brain concentrates on this silly game, the other bit gets to gently float and seems to renew itself a bit. :)
nice...
You should try it! My highscore is 2176 with an average of 384 - it also shows that I have sofar done 3584 games. Oops ;)
See..when I started it I cared what my highscore was, now I just do it because it organises my brain so nicely!
Anyway... you can download it here.
Shock horror!
Some lunatics have cocked something up so badly that it is now up to me to make it better (at work that is) and it will take me a few days to get on top of that.
Apart from that we bought some new stuff to put on eBay which keeps me busy in the time I do not try and fix other peoples mistakes.
So now.. 21:50 ... it is time.. for a tad of Bubblet... do you know it?
It is the most lovely shareware ever made I think... I went through spades (spates?) of Tetris and Bejeweled and all that sort of very nervy games but they just agitated me.. at this time of night I want to do something very light and dull, not to excited to just get my brain back into a normal gear.
Something to do with A and B flows I think? Have you heard of that, that if you are in a state of sort of hypnosis that another part of your brain gets a chance to come to the forefront? Well, I don't know the technicalities of it but it works for me.. if one part of my brain concentrates on this silly game, the other bit gets to gently float and seems to renew itself a bit. :)
nice...
You should try it! My highscore is 2176 with an average of 384 - it also shows that I have sofar done 3584 games. Oops ;)
See..when I started it I cared what my highscore was, now I just do it because it organises my brain so nicely!
Anyway... you can download it here.
Sunday, March 26, 2006
There is no end
to the pleasure!Not only did we get our beloved Welsh Dresser, today I undid the xMas lights (see post below) and added a lovely very tactile suede light. Very cute indeed!
We are using (of course) long life bulbs and they are supposed to use close to NO energy but man... they are a bit too fierce!
So exciting new task for next week, find a little less enthusiastic light bulbs!
See... I did say .. there is no end to this pleasure.
Pity I have this overwhelming feeling of DON'T WANNA WORK TOMORROW!!!!!!!
:-)
Saturday, March 25, 2006
Fulfilling one's destiny
When Kevin was about 13 he watched me fit a new top that I bought that afternoon and was particularly pleased with. He looked at me and said 'that is nice mum, it looks like you have always had it'.
Strangely enough I often think back to those words when I am fitting clothes. If it doesn't look/feel like I have always had it I know it is not going to be my favorite piece of clothing, it works...
Thursday I went for a walk to the Spar for a change and had a look at the notice board. All sorts of course, old cars, tables, beds, a car boot announcement, all sorts. Also in the top corner there was a colour print out of a Pine Welsh Dresser for 70 pound ono (= or near offer, took me a while to get that one!)
Since we are ALWAYS suffering from lack of space due to our tendency to hoard I was really interested because it looked like a great thing with loads of cupboards and drawers, my mouth watered with the idea of how much STUFF I could cram in it and still have some space to display some of our favourite items.
I didn't give us a lot of chance, I know those adverts go up and are then never taken down again and generally when calling they are long gone. So not this one, John gave them a call to save me the embarassement of any language issues and yesterday we had a look.
Wow.. that was a surprise, it is even better than I thought! It was a bit dark in the room where it was but it was very clear to see that the quality was a lot better than expected and it even had extra little drawers in the top bit that I hadn't spotted. And still John had the audacity to say 'you say ONO, to prevent us bartering, how low would you go' :-). And she said 60! Hooray!
So... late this afternoon we made place for it in our house and luckily in the light it still looked as nice as I hoped it would be.
And again I had to think of Kevin, it feels like it belongs here, like it was waiting for us and now finally found its destiny :-)
Need to still sort some lighting out so ignore the xMas lights but meet our Pine Welsh Dresser:
Doesn't it look like it has 'arrived'?
I love this feeling of 'knowing' something is meant for me. Like this house, we stepped inside it and just 'knew' it was ours. I can't ever imagine selling it, just like I can't ever imagine getting rid of this dresser (wonder why it is called a dresser though :-))
Strangely enough I often think back to those words when I am fitting clothes. If it doesn't look/feel like I have always had it I know it is not going to be my favorite piece of clothing, it works...
Thursday I went for a walk to the Spar for a change and had a look at the notice board. All sorts of course, old cars, tables, beds, a car boot announcement, all sorts. Also in the top corner there was a colour print out of a Pine Welsh Dresser for 70 pound ono (= or near offer, took me a while to get that one!)
Since we are ALWAYS suffering from lack of space due to our tendency to hoard I was really interested because it looked like a great thing with loads of cupboards and drawers, my mouth watered with the idea of how much STUFF I could cram in it and still have some space to display some of our favourite items.
I didn't give us a lot of chance, I know those adverts go up and are then never taken down again and generally when calling they are long gone. So not this one, John gave them a call to save me the embarassement of any language issues and yesterday we had a look.
Wow.. that was a surprise, it is even better than I thought! It was a bit dark in the room where it was but it was very clear to see that the quality was a lot better than expected and it even had extra little drawers in the top bit that I hadn't spotted. And still John had the audacity to say 'you say ONO, to prevent us bartering, how low would you go' :-). And she said 60! Hooray!
So... late this afternoon we made place for it in our house and luckily in the light it still looked as nice as I hoped it would be.
And again I had to think of Kevin, it feels like it belongs here, like it was waiting for us and now finally found its destiny :-)
Need to still sort some lighting out so ignore the xMas lights but meet our Pine Welsh Dresser:
Doesn't it look like it has 'arrived'?I love this feeling of 'knowing' something is meant for me. Like this house, we stepped inside it and just 'knew' it was ours. I can't ever imagine selling it, just like I can't ever imagine getting rid of this dresser (wonder why it is called a dresser though :-))
Friday, March 24, 2006
Gosh..
Dooce did it again...
I don't know why so many things she talks about ring a bell in me. This time she wrote about an aunt of her who has been diagnosed with breast cancer, an excerpt:
I felt like that, my grandparents of my mothers side both died of heartattacks, my grandad at 72 and my grandmother at 86. My fathers parents I never really knew, if I remember correctly granddad died in a road accident (which is unfortunate but not hereditary :-)) and my grandmother I believe at an old age but suffered from rheuma. Which thank God doesn't seem to have gone down the gene line. Phew!
Anyway... I recognise the terror... About 7 years or so ago one of my mums sisters was diagnosed with what the doctors thought was an appendix. She was treated in the same hospital as she worked in a PR position and was loved to bits by everyone there. I never forget my mum calling me in hysterics when I was at work saying 'Ria has cancer'. They operated on her and could do nothing more than close her again, there was nothing they could do for her and within a matter of weeks she died, colon cancer. It is horrific what the disease does, absolutely excruciating to see someone you love succumb to the pain, being pumped with more and more morfine to stave off the pain until the body finally gives up. Awful.
WHY? For months I kept on thinking that.. and I felt the same terror as Dooce describes. The feeling I always had of 'oh well dying of a heartattack can't be fun but at least it is quick' and the satisfaction of crossing out all the awful illnesses which can run in a family when I had to get a new GP was gone. Cancer happened in our family.
And WHY? She seemed healthy, she seemed aware of food and what was good and bad for a person? She didn't share her feelings with anyone though, maybe that was it, maybe she... I ran through all of these things in my mind for years until I reached the only conclusion I could reach.
It *can* happen to me. It can happen to all of us. And I can only do what is in my power which is trying to take care of my body by brisk walking at least 5 times a week and eating 2 fruit and 3 portions of vegetables, eat more fibre, eat less fat, eat more fish, eat less red meat, eat only wholegrain.
And failing miserably some days, of course ;)
As you know, I love being this age but sometimes... I long back to the days of way back when when I didn't even realise 'these things' could happen to me, because youth prevents you from seeing any danger and 'what am I going to wear to this weeks party' is a lot more important.
I don't know why so many things she talks about ring a bell in me. This time she wrote about an aunt of her who has been diagnosed with breast cancer, an excerpt:
Finally, today my mother’s sister, my Aunt Lola, is having a mastectomy. She was diagnosed with breast cancer only a few weeks ago, and this has affected me in truly surprising ways. I am of course deeply saddened and torn apart that this has happened to her and what this means for her body, for the way she has to live the rest of her life, for the years that may have already been cut from her life. At the same time this is bad news for the rest of the women in my family who have up until now enjoyed the luxury of telling our primary care physicians that no one in our family has ever suffered breast cancer. The magnitude of what this means for us is still unknown, and that frankly terrifies me in almost indescribable ways. It is that terror that surprises me, but it is also that terror that has renewed in me a devotion to keeping myself healthy, a devotion to celebrating my heritage while at the same time fighting what that heritage could possibly mean.Not only do I love her use of the English language but the feeling.. is SO recognisable.
I felt like that, my grandparents of my mothers side both died of heartattacks, my grandad at 72 and my grandmother at 86. My fathers parents I never really knew, if I remember correctly granddad died in a road accident (which is unfortunate but not hereditary :-)) and my grandmother I believe at an old age but suffered from rheuma. Which thank God doesn't seem to have gone down the gene line. Phew!
Anyway... I recognise the terror... About 7 years or so ago one of my mums sisters was diagnosed with what the doctors thought was an appendix. She was treated in the same hospital as she worked in a PR position and was loved to bits by everyone there. I never forget my mum calling me in hysterics when I was at work saying 'Ria has cancer'. They operated on her and could do nothing more than close her again, there was nothing they could do for her and within a matter of weeks she died, colon cancer. It is horrific what the disease does, absolutely excruciating to see someone you love succumb to the pain, being pumped with more and more morfine to stave off the pain until the body finally gives up. Awful.
WHY? For months I kept on thinking that.. and I felt the same terror as Dooce describes. The feeling I always had of 'oh well dying of a heartattack can't be fun but at least it is quick' and the satisfaction of crossing out all the awful illnesses which can run in a family when I had to get a new GP was gone. Cancer happened in our family.
And WHY? She seemed healthy, she seemed aware of food and what was good and bad for a person? She didn't share her feelings with anyone though, maybe that was it, maybe she... I ran through all of these things in my mind for years until I reached the only conclusion I could reach.
It *can* happen to me. It can happen to all of us. And I can only do what is in my power which is trying to take care of my body by brisk walking at least 5 times a week and eating 2 fruit and 3 portions of vegetables, eat more fibre, eat less fat, eat more fish, eat less red meat, eat only wholegrain.
And failing miserably some days, of course ;)
As you know, I love being this age but sometimes... I long back to the days of way back when when I didn't even realise 'these things' could happen to me, because youth prevents you from seeing any danger and 'what am I going to wear to this weeks party' is a lot more important.
Thursday, March 23, 2006
Can't walk? Learn how to surf!
Hey!
What do you think of that as my advertising?
Or do you think that the over 70's won't know that it is called 'surfing'?
John had a few other ideas:
Fun what?
This idea is really starting to settle... but of course I suffer from what I always suffer and that is that the ideas start rolling in hard and fast, I never have to be told to think out of my box, I wouldn't know there was a box :-)
It is hard to know what to focus on first...
I could just put an add in the local 'village news' but what do I say? 'I am great hire me as a tutor' - or 'give me 1000 quid and I will install wireless broadband all included' - If I was reading that I would feel yeah right, who are you?
So... I feel I can't really do that without having a website ready (for all those rich children who would love to just hire someone to get their parents online) and maybe even a simple leaflet SHOULD someone give me a call and says 'can you send me a brochure please'. :-)
Well.. it most certainly de-bores me and since that was the object of this game I suppose I will just have to try and enjoy this period :)
Oh and if you can think of a good name for this venture or a great tagline, do let me know!
What do you think of that as my advertising?
Or do you think that the over 70's won't know that it is called 'surfing'?
John had a few other ideas:
Surf at Eighty; Surfing for the over Seventies; Get Granny online; CyberGran; GET out more - GET online; GET GRANDMA out more - GET HER online; You are never too old to surf; You are never too old to......... (see the world) (Surf) (tune in) (etc); POLIS (Pensioners Online in Scotland); Pensioners Byte Back;
Fun what?
This idea is really starting to settle... but of course I suffer from what I always suffer and that is that the ideas start rolling in hard and fast, I never have to be told to think out of my box, I wouldn't know there was a box :-)
It is hard to know what to focus on first...
I could just put an add in the local 'village news' but what do I say? 'I am great hire me as a tutor' - or 'give me 1000 quid and I will install wireless broadband all included' - If I was reading that I would feel yeah right, who are you?
So... I feel I can't really do that without having a website ready (for all those rich children who would love to just hire someone to get their parents online) and maybe even a simple leaflet SHOULD someone give me a call and says 'can you send me a brochure please'. :-)
Well.. it most certainly de-bores me and since that was the object of this game I suppose I will just have to try and enjoy this period :)
Oh and if you can think of a good name for this venture or a great tagline, do let me know!
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
Boredom
leads to eating.
We all know that.
So.. it is extraordinarily important to me to not get bored or when bored to de-bore myself as quick as I can.
Problem is though that with 'bored' also the 'can't be bothered' kicks in.
Is it any coincidence that the word 'bothered' can be split up in THE BORED?
Ha!
Anyway, being aware that staying bored can only lead to mischief of having too many gingernuts (28 pence from Tesco, best cookies in the world because of their taste AND consistency being sweet, spicy and rock hard which makes you feel you had something to eat, much better than any spongy things :-))
I need to get my brain into gear and think of possibilities instead of making songs on 'I am so bored, so bored, so bored'.
So.... possible career change (don't panic, I will not do anything rash :-))
is...
pom pom pom....
Tutoring elderly in Scotland in simple computing.
Does that make sense?
In fact.. it is my mother in law who gave me the idea, she decided I had talked her into it and bought herself for her 79th birthday a wireless laptop and router when I promised to set her up (in a merely positive way of course) with broadband and would give her the basics of 'how to work with a laptop and an internet connection'.
Since we came really close to bullying her into it instead of talking her into it, I was really scared that she would totally not like it and blame me for making a dubious purchase.
But no.... except for some router issues which were caused by a lightning strike it all has gone extremely smooth.
I got the broadband for her (did all the calling and administration), ordered the hardware (laptop, router, printer), took reception of it all and last April she got connected.
I have spent a few hours with her slowly trying to explain Outlook Express to her, Internet Explorer, a bit of Word, some basic Windows file and folder handling and she is absolutely over the moon!
She is now emailing her grand children (and children) regularly, types out her notes from a weekly meeting she attends in Word which she loves because of the red squigglies it gives when she types anybodies names, watches life sport events online (BBC Sport), thinks google is so clever that it comes up with an answer for everything, and is addicted to 'Spider' (a standard game that comes with Windows).
She is a bit worried about it because now she says when the internet connection is not working for some reason or other she feels 'cut off'. She is also very miffed that 'the computer doesn't come with a user manual, just a little book where you can look up how you can copy and paste and things'. And asked if it wasn't possible to just download the internet
Generally though, it has all been a doddle, I have so much fun trying to make her understand things like how email works, to try and get her to see that Microsoft programmes really all work the same with copy and paste (failing miserably so far) and I know I am not known as a patient person but I never get tired of explaining it, I think it is fun.
So... I suddenly thought.. is there a market here? Are there more over 70's that would like to be connected but are a bit daunted by it all? And would love to get the personal one on one attention? Or carehomes, would they be interested to be 'connected' and getting training on 'how to contact your grandchildren'?
And how do I start?
Well... the idea certainly de-bored me!
Please, tell me why it is a rubbish idea? Or tell me why not? Or give me the name of your grandparents who would be interested (and live in Scotland preferably :-))
We all know that.
So.. it is extraordinarily important to me to not get bored or when bored to de-bore myself as quick as I can.
Problem is though that with 'bored' also the 'can't be bothered' kicks in.
Is it any coincidence that the word 'bothered' can be split up in THE BORED?
Ha!
Anyway, being aware that staying bored can only lead to mischief of having too many gingernuts (28 pence from Tesco, best cookies in the world because of their taste AND consistency being sweet, spicy and rock hard which makes you feel you had something to eat, much better than any spongy things :-))
I need to get my brain into gear and think of possibilities instead of making songs on 'I am so bored, so bored, so bored'.
So.... possible career change (don't panic, I will not do anything rash :-))
is...
pom pom pom....
Tutoring elderly in Scotland in simple computing.
Does that make sense?
In fact.. it is my mother in law who gave me the idea, she decided I had talked her into it and bought herself for her 79th birthday a wireless laptop and router when I promised to set her up (in a merely positive way of course) with broadband and would give her the basics of 'how to work with a laptop and an internet connection'.
Since we came really close to bullying her into it instead of talking her into it, I was really scared that she would totally not like it and blame me for making a dubious purchase.
But no.... except for some router issues which were caused by a lightning strike it all has gone extremely smooth.
I got the broadband for her (did all the calling and administration), ordered the hardware (laptop, router, printer), took reception of it all and last April she got connected.
I have spent a few hours with her slowly trying to explain Outlook Express to her, Internet Explorer, a bit of Word, some basic Windows file and folder handling and she is absolutely over the moon!
She is now emailing her grand children (and children) regularly, types out her notes from a weekly meeting she attends in Word which she loves because of the red squigglies it gives when she types anybodies names
She is a bit worried about it because now she says when the internet connection is not working for some reason or other she feels 'cut off'. She is also very miffed that 'the computer doesn't come with a user manual, just a little book where you can look up how you can copy and paste and things'. And asked if it wasn't possible to just download the internet
Generally though, it has all been a doddle, I have so much fun trying to make her understand things like how email works, to try and get her to see that Microsoft programmes really all work the same with copy and paste (failing miserably so far) and I know I am not known as a patient person but I never get tired of explaining it, I think it is fun.
So... I suddenly thought.. is there a market here? Are there more over 70's that would like to be connected but are a bit daunted by it all? And would love to get the personal one on one attention? Or carehomes, would they be interested to be 'connected' and getting training on 'how to contact your grandchildren'?
And how do I start?
Well... the idea certainly de-bored me!
Please, tell me why it is a rubbish idea? Or tell me why not? Or give me the name of your grandparents who would be interested (and live in Scotland preferably :-))
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
Blogging
is so much about trying to desperately think of something to write when you KNOW you have absolutely nothing to share at all because your life has reached a level uneventfullness that is almost painful.
From being enormously emotionally instable I have grown into this boring old fart.
Do you know how much time you have left per day if you don't contstantly have to fret about the latest drama in your life?
My friend Karin and me often discussed this phenomena and came to the conclusion that once you reach this state you need a hobby.
So, blogging to me sounded like a fun thing to do, nothing to strenuous (meaning I can sit and only move my fingers like I do the rest of my day as well of course, thinks.. wonder when RSI is gonna set in).
Anyway.. this blogging is so much more difficult than I would have thought. I always thought I could talk for England, Scotland *and* Holland and never be out of things to say or talk about.
But now.. after doing this for 2 months or so I have so run out of things to say.
I suppose it is also because so many things are off limit since I don't want to lose my job and don't want to hurt anyone I know so when you can't kick off about your job or your family and friends, what is left?
News? Neh.. boring, everybody does that. TV? Yeah, sometimes maybe but not every time.
So... thinking about what on earth I could talk about now I found this picture on my hard drive.
Do you see anything weird in the top of the glass?
What do you see?
We bought this glass at a carboot sale a few years ago and planned to sell it on eBay, we were unsuccessful mind you, nobody was interested and I can't even remember where the glass is now, probably somewhere in the loft.
Only by accident we saw what had appeared in the picture.
Cool eh?
Anybody know any good 'send your ghost picture here' sites?
From being enormously emotionally instable I have grown into this boring old fart.
Do you know how much time you have left per day if you don't contstantly have to fret about the latest drama in your life?
My friend Karin and me often discussed this phenomena and came to the conclusion that once you reach this state you need a hobby.
So, blogging to me sounded like a fun thing to do, nothing to strenuous (meaning I can sit and only move my fingers like I do the rest of my day as well of course, thinks.. wonder when RSI is gonna set in).
Anyway.. this blogging is so much more difficult than I would have thought. I always thought I could talk for England, Scotland *and* Holland and never be out of things to say or talk about.
But now.. after doing this for 2 months or so I have so run out of things to say.
I suppose it is also because so many things are off limit since I don't want to lose my job and don't want to hurt anyone I know so when you can't kick off about your job or your family and friends, what is left?
News? Neh.. boring, everybody does that. TV? Yeah, sometimes maybe but not every time.
So... thinking about what on earth I could talk about now I found this picture on my hard drive.
Do you see anything weird in the top of the glass?
What do you see?
We bought this glass at a carboot sale a few years ago and planned to sell it on eBay, we were unsuccessful mind you, nobody was interested and I can't even remember where the glass is now, probably somewhere in the loft.
Only by accident we saw what had appeared in the picture.
Cool eh?
Anybody know any good 'send your ghost picture here' sites?
Sunday, March 19, 2006
Boris' 1st mission accomplished!
Well today was finally the day that it *wasn't* raining or foggy in Scotland!
Even better than that, the sun shone brightly most of the day and it revealed Arran!
Which of course also meant that we could fulfill one of Boris' missions to 'gaze upon Arran'
You can see the results here.
It was a great day today, Johns' mum had lunch with us to celebrate her 80th birthday. Lovely it was too, cheated with a Tesco healthy living prawn cocktail starter, then a lovely recipe from Delia (cauliflower and broccoli with rice and blue cheese gratin) and of course a great Delia dessert (hot citrus pudding), that last one was brilliant, very special, it uses only a little flour and loads of citrus juices which in the oven develops into a creamy sauce topped with a light soft crunchy top, very special stuff and it looked great too!
We topped it all off with 2 bottles of red wine and a few Ponche Caballero's with coffee after which Johns mum rolled herself down the hill to her house, nice :-)
Glad it is Monday tomorrow, can't wait to get into a healthy rythm again after all that ;-)
Even better than that, the sun shone brightly most of the day and it revealed Arran!
Which of course also meant that we could fulfill one of Boris' missions to 'gaze upon Arran'
You can see the results here.
It was a great day today, Johns' mum had lunch with us to celebrate her 80th birthday. Lovely it was too, cheated with a Tesco healthy living prawn cocktail starter, then a lovely recipe from Delia (cauliflower and broccoli with rice and blue cheese gratin) and of course a great Delia dessert (hot citrus pudding), that last one was brilliant, very special, it uses only a little flour and loads of citrus juices which in the oven develops into a creamy sauce topped with a light soft crunchy top, very special stuff and it looked great too!
We topped it all off with 2 bottles of red wine and a few Ponche Caballero's with coffee after which Johns mum rolled herself down the hill to her house, nice :-)
Glad it is Monday tomorrow, can't wait to get into a healthy rythm again after all that ;-)
Saturday, March 18, 2006
PMT
Perfect Moment for Total-pig-out
Thinks.. wonder what Johns excuse is :-)
Today we had lovely cheese sandwiches at Johns' mum with a fantastic treacle pudding for pudding. I can't tell you how many calories were in that lunch but I am sure it was over the recommended daily allowance. So glad we had some bits of lettuce and other healthy veggies as well, at least I don't have to beat myself up over those!
Anyway, generally we just top the Saturday off with a bowl of cereal (chocolate shreddies is the latest, they are brilliant, they have bad things in them of course like sugar and chocolate and all that BUT they also have 6.9 grams of fibre per serving (I think, could be per 100 not sure now) and can be classed therefore as good-ish food).
So not today.. At around 6 John felt pekish in 'something' savoury. And since we are trying to empty the freezer (since I fear of health and safety issues due to old age of the products and the occasional de-freeze when we leave the door open accidentally) he thought a pizza would be a good idea.
Well... I am a fan! Love pizza.. in Holland we have a pizza per person, SOME people might have a salad on the side but these people are never in my company somehow. I can devour any pizza easily on my own but when I tried to put 2 pizza's in the oven the first time John and I would have pizza he looked at me like I was going MAD.
Of course.. one only ever eats half a pizza and then adds something else. So I thought, lettuce? Garlic bread? Olives?
No silly, baked beans of course! (Ah.. I see.. .yeah why not add some more carbodhydrates to an already very stodgy item of food :-))
Anyway, after 5 years I am used to this now. I have come to terms that pizza is eaten in halves and has baked beans added to it. Probably even marginally better calorie and fat wise.
Yesterday we had been talking about all the things we should not forget to eat because they are in danger of going 'off'. Amongst these are about 5 tins of HP spaghetti. (WHAT? TINNED spaghetti?? YUK!) Of course these have only been bought by John FOR John when he has an emergency like me being in Holland and him not wanting to put any effort in at all.
So.. can you see this one coming?
He looked at me with a very cheeky enthusiastic grin and said 'remember that we had this conversation yesterday and wouldn't it be a good idea to have a pizza and have the spaghetti with it'!? I mean.. how can anyone say no to a beautiful face like that?
I couldn't.. so I gave him 7/8th of the tin and the rest to myself but even that amount was just too absolutely yukkie to believe. Why is it allowed to make and sell this AND then say with added vitamines and minerals. Added! Brrrr..
And what is this thing here about making all tomato things taste sweet anyway? And to eat carbs with carbs? Like chipsbutties is a normal thing? Battered and fried pizza?
Brr... 'You are so welcome to that' I will say next time!
To make it better I unfroze some applecake and had that with double cream, that did satisfy the PMT animal.
Lets pray for the break through to come quickly before a break out happens to my face :-)
Thinks.. wonder what Johns excuse is :-)
Today we had lovely cheese sandwiches at Johns' mum with a fantastic treacle pudding for pudding. I can't tell you how many calories were in that lunch but I am sure it was over the recommended daily allowance. So glad we had some bits of lettuce and other healthy veggies as well, at least I don't have to beat myself up over those!
Anyway, generally we just top the Saturday off with a bowl of cereal (chocolate shreddies is the latest, they are brilliant, they have bad things in them of course like sugar and chocolate and all that BUT they also have 6.9 grams of fibre per serving (I think, could be per 100 not sure now) and can be classed therefore as good-ish food).
So not today.. At around 6 John felt pekish in 'something' savoury. And since we are trying to empty the freezer (since I fear of health and safety issues due to old age of the products and the occasional de-freeze when we leave the door open accidentally) he thought a pizza would be a good idea.
Well... I am a fan! Love pizza.. in Holland we have a pizza per person, SOME people might have a salad on the side but these people are never in my company somehow. I can devour any pizza easily on my own but when I tried to put 2 pizza's in the oven the first time John and I would have pizza he looked at me like I was going MAD.
Of course.. one only ever eats half a pizza and then adds something else. So I thought, lettuce? Garlic bread? Olives?
No silly, baked beans of course! (Ah.. I see.. .yeah why not add some more carbodhydrates to an already very stodgy item of food :-))
Anyway, after 5 years I am used to this now. I have come to terms that pizza is eaten in halves and has baked beans added to it. Probably even marginally better calorie and fat wise.
Yesterday we had been talking about all the things we should not forget to eat because they are in danger of going 'off'. Amongst these are about 5 tins of HP spaghetti. (WHAT? TINNED spaghetti?? YUK!) Of course these have only been bought by John FOR John when he has an emergency like me being in Holland and him not wanting to put any effort in at all.
So.. can you see this one coming?
He looked at me with a very cheeky enthusiastic grin and said 'remember that we had this conversation yesterday and wouldn't it be a good idea to have a pizza and have the spaghetti with it'!? I mean.. how can anyone say no to a beautiful face like that?
I couldn't.. so I gave him 7/8th of the tin and the rest to myself but even that amount was just too absolutely yukkie to believe. Why is it allowed to make and sell this AND then say with added vitamines and minerals. Added! Brrrr..
And what is this thing here about making all tomato things taste sweet anyway? And to eat carbs with carbs? Like chipsbutties is a normal thing? Battered and fried pizza?
Brr... 'You are so welcome to that' I will say next time!
To make it better I unfroze some applecake and had that with double cream, that did satisfy the PMT animal.
Lets pray for the break through to come quickly before a break out happens to my face :-)
Friday, March 17, 2006
Midlife crisis
OK.. It is official...
I am in the middle of a midlife crisis.
When I heard of those in the past I always had these visions of deep and painful drama but, at least in my case, that is not what it feels like at all.
I suppose... Being 45 is like being on the top of a mountain, I feel strong and in charge, I finally know who I am, what I am crap at and what I am quite good at, I don't constantly criticise myself with everything I do or if I look into the mirror, occasionally I am even able to tell myself 'you are O.K.'
So... to me, what a midlife crisis feels like is 'what now?'
Is this actually the top of the mountain? Is this the height of the party and is it time to leave? Is this the top of the mountain and should I now go for the leisurely walk down on the other side of the mountain? Or is this one of those tops from which you can see the top of the next mountain?
It's my job you see... it is nice.. I have a nice colleague I work with who has taught me all he knew about Lotus Notes, DB2, Approach and so much more. All my technical bits have been rattled and cuddled and refreshed and I feel replete. This is about how much technical info I will ever want or need. I will always be a user, never a developer, I do not have the ambition really, I do like fixing things which makes me sometimes come across as a developer I suppose....
This job is also so nice because I get to work from home, which I love.. I like the being able to work in jimjams if I want to and the fact that I can go to the beach for lunch, it is lovely to follow my own energy all day. And not only that, it allows me to work from Holland occasionally, it can't get better than that!
BUT.... I miss working in a team, having meaningful contacts, doing something with 'all of us'. And.. they don't pay me enough, I feel undervalued.
So... what now.. should I just take all the upsides (nice colleague, work from home), accept that perfection does not exist and 'sit it out' until John and I ride into the retirement sunset?
Or do I go for it? Am I going to go through all these horrifying processes like job interviews and assessments to get a job outside of this BAC and go work for another one for a few more years to try and get some of my currently unused bits active again?
Or will it just be jumping into the fire?
See.. and that is why it is called a midlife crisis.. because no matter how often I ask myself that question, the answer doesn't seem to come!
(disclaimer: I am totally and fully aware that this 'crisis' is nothing more than a very luxury problem :-)!)
I am in the middle of a midlife crisis.
When I heard of those in the past I always had these visions of deep and painful drama but, at least in my case, that is not what it feels like at all.
I suppose... Being 45 is like being on the top of a mountain, I feel strong and in charge, I finally know who I am, what I am crap at and what I am quite good at, I don't constantly criticise myself with everything I do or if I look into the mirror, occasionally I am even able to tell myself 'you are O.K.'
So... to me, what a midlife crisis feels like is 'what now?'
Is this actually the top of the mountain? Is this the height of the party and is it time to leave? Is this the top of the mountain and should I now go for the leisurely walk down on the other side of the mountain? Or is this one of those tops from which you can see the top of the next mountain?
It's my job you see... it is nice.. I have a nice colleague I work with who has taught me all he knew about Lotus Notes, DB2, Approach and so much more. All my technical bits have been rattled and cuddled and refreshed and I feel replete. This is about how much technical info I will ever want or need. I will always be a user, never a developer, I do not have the ambition really, I do like fixing things which makes me sometimes come across as a developer I suppose....
This job is also so nice because I get to work from home, which I love.. I like the being able to work in jimjams if I want to and the fact that I can go to the beach for lunch, it is lovely to follow my own energy all day. And not only that, it allows me to work from Holland occasionally, it can't get better than that!
BUT.... I miss working in a team, having meaningful contacts, doing something with 'all of us'. And.. they don't pay me enough, I feel undervalued.
So... what now.. should I just take all the upsides (nice colleague, work from home), accept that perfection does not exist and 'sit it out' until John and I ride into the retirement sunset?
Or do I go for it? Am I going to go through all these horrifying processes like job interviews and assessments to get a job outside of this BAC and go work for another one for a few more years to try and get some of my currently unused bits active again?
Or will it just be jumping into the fire?
See.. and that is why it is called a midlife crisis.. because no matter how often I ask myself that question, the answer doesn't seem to come!
(disclaimer: I am totally and fully aware that this 'crisis' is nothing more than a very luxury problem :-)!)
Thursday, March 16, 2006
Boris
Yesterday on Johns birthday he got an envelope which felt a bit bulky!
Turns out it was a cute card from his daughter *and* a letter wrapped around a little soft bear.
In short... we have received 'Boris', he is a little bear that is a member of ToyVoyagers
Every little toy gets a few missions it has to complete, Boris' missions are:
Missions (0 out of 5 complete):
Well.. the first one is easy, since we look out on the Isle of Arran, and even have a sticker donated by Gea & Gerrit saying 'Arran is for lovers' so that is nice for Boris!
Snooker shouldn't be too big of a problem but anything with 'buy' in it gets frowned upon since it might cause us to pay off the mortgage one second later and then the 4th one? The arctic circle?
How are we supposed to do that!!
I am not even gonna begin about a rock concert!
Anyway, luckily we are not totally and solely responsible for him reaching his missions and I can think of people who want to attend a rock concert or buy something for him from eBay but going to the arctic circle?!
On the website it says that you can also put him up for 'adoption' by leaving him somewhere where he is likely to be found by nice people who want to hold and cuddle him and take him to the arctic circle.
So.. how do I get him to the arctic cirlce!!! I tried to think out of my box here and I suppose what we are looking for here is one of those expeditions.
Do you think he would be safe if I sent him to this address? http://www.arctictreks.com/
:-)
Anyway.. bit of time yet, first he needs to be photographed and get his log updated to prove that he saw Arran!
All suggestions gratefully received!
Turns out it was a cute card from his daughter *and* a letter wrapped around a little soft bear.
In short... we have received 'Boris', he is a little bear that is a member of ToyVoyagers
Every little toy gets a few missions it has to complete, Boris' missions are:
Missions (0 out of 5 complete):
| Incomplete: | Let Boris gaze upon the Isle of Arran |
| Incomplete: | Let Boris watch a game of snooker (he loves snooker) |
| Incomplete: | Buy Boris an outfit off Ebay |
| Incomplete: | Take Boris inside the Arctic Circle (preferably in the summer as the long nights scare him) |
| Incomplete: | Take him to a concert (rock's his favourite) |
Well.. the first one is easy, since we look out on the Isle of Arran, and even have a sticker donated by Gea & Gerrit saying 'Arran is for lovers' so that is nice for Boris!
Snooker shouldn't be too big of a problem but anything with 'buy' in it gets frowned upon since it might cause us to pay off the mortgage one second later and then the 4th one? The arctic circle?
How are we supposed to do that!!
I am not even gonna begin about a rock concert!
Anyway, luckily we are not totally and solely responsible for him reaching his missions and I can think of people who want to attend a rock concert or buy something for him from eBay but going to the arctic circle?!
On the website it says that you can also put him up for 'adoption' by leaving him somewhere where he is likely to be found by nice people who want to hold and cuddle him and take him to the arctic circle.
So.. how do I get him to the arctic cirlce!!! I tried to think out of my box here and I suppose what we are looking for here is one of those expeditions.
Do you think he would be safe if I sent him to this address? http://www.arctictreks.com/
:-)
Anyway.. bit of time yet, first he needs to be photographed and get his log updated to prove that he saw Arran!
All suggestions gratefully received!
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
Fifty Five!
Is not old? Surely!?
I remember how I looked at old people in the workplace... thought that when they reached sort of 50 they were well over it and should definately retire.
I must say though that most of the people (mostly men strangely enough) of that age were fed up and tired from working and going through the motions trying to avoid any work and 'sit it out' until retirement would take them into a 'let's go fishing' lifestyle.
So not my John :-) He still jumps over walls, bends down constantly on our walks because he is saving the world from rubbish which he then recycles, carries heavy things around like a real man and looks no day older than 45!
So.. is 55 the new 45? 45 the new 35?
The average age of women having babies was 26 about 20 years ago, now it is over 30! (which I believe also proves that 35 is the new 25!)
Is it me? Or is everything happening later?
Or is it just that now I finally know the secret of 'age' being just a number and that it isn't any proof of being 'over the hill' that it all seems to happen later?
If I look at my mum (who is 70 - which is the new 60?) she seems to be really happy travelling around Holland, see places and do things with her friends and keeps very socially active 'online' being part of a few email groups.
Then I see my mother in law who bought herself a laptop and wireless internet connection for her 79th birthday and has become close to being computer addicted ('I feel so cut off when my router is not working) and I come to the conclusion that my theory is right, 80 is the new 70!
Anyway, if we are all going to live until we are 100 (and that is a reality apparently, look here) - 55 is absolutely nothing!
I feel so young :-)
I remember how I looked at old people in the workplace... thought that when they reached sort of 50 they were well over it and should definately retire.
I must say though that most of the people (mostly men strangely enough) of that age were fed up and tired from working and going through the motions trying to avoid any work and 'sit it out' until retirement would take them into a 'let's go fishing' lifestyle.
So not my John :-) He still jumps over walls, bends down constantly on our walks because he is saving the world from rubbish which he then recycles, carries heavy things around like a real man and looks no day older than 45!
So.. is 55 the new 45? 45 the new 35?
The average age of women having babies was 26 about 20 years ago, now it is over 30! (which I believe also proves that 35 is the new 25!)
Is it me? Or is everything happening later?
Or is it just that now I finally know the secret of 'age' being just a number and that it isn't any proof of being 'over the hill' that it all seems to happen later?
If I look at my mum (who is 70 - which is the new 60?) she seems to be really happy travelling around Holland, see places and do things with her friends and keeps very socially active 'online' being part of a few email groups.
Then I see my mother in law who bought herself a laptop and wireless internet connection for her 79th birthday and has become close to being computer addicted ('I feel so cut off when my router is not working) and I come to the conclusion that my theory is right, 80 is the new 70!
Anyway, if we are all going to live until we are 100 (and that is a reality apparently, look here) - 55 is absolutely nothing!
I feel so young :-)
Sunday, March 12, 2006
Sneeuw!
How gorgeous is this? And just when I said that it never snows here because we are too close to the sea! This picture is so beautiful I think because it shows it all, the estuary we look out on all day, the nice Scottish 'castle' (which are now 4 extremely posh apartments) and the emphasis on the snow flakes because John said he forgot to switch the flash off.Must admit, when I woke up it looked a lot lighter :-)
This shows you how snow distorts things... on the far right of the picture is our garage, in a straight line rom that there is the long part of our house which ends in the 2 pointy bits. Looking at this picture it feels like that long bit is built out towards the sea, very weird...
It is still snowing... who knows, we might be snowed in soon (YAY!)
Thursday, March 09, 2006
Brave old me...
I had been putting it off for too long.
I knew I had to do it soon...
So, I thought shall I call? Neh...
Maybe go by? hmmm...
What is better.. what will make me feel less embarrassed.. hard choice...lets bury it for a little while, there is time yet it still doesn't look too bad.
I could have gone on like that for months until this invitation arrived for a ...... P A R T Y ... !! Well.. the invitation wasn't necessarily for me, I am 'Tanja no mates' in this country but luckily John has a life :p-) and I get to go with him. He is so sweet!
With a P A R T Y to look forward to I didn't have any excuse left though, it just HAD to happen.
So, today in my lunch break instead of walking to the beach I walked to the 'shopping centre' of Wemyss Bay. I put this between apostrophes because the 'centre' consists of a Spar, a pharmacy, a hairdresser and a doctors surgery which is only sometimes open I think, luckily I seem to be quite healthy so haven't needed it yet except for horrible mandatory things which I shall spare you from.
Walking towards the centre I kept on practising with different sentences in my mind, trying to make sure that I am getting my message across and think of the moment when the reaction would come. I realised then that there are 2 potential moments where embarrassement might strike... when talking not being understood and when talked to not understanding.
The tension mounted while getting closer to THE moment until I finally arrived, had a bit of a dither if it really wasn't better to just use the telephone but decided that with the P A R T Y ahead I wanted to be sure that I would get an appointment and not be too late.
So... first hurdle, the door, there is this big HEAVY door which has a sign on it saying 'please hold door when closing it' or words to that effect. Of course I failed that hurdle and the door crashed closed behind me with a big bang!
Anyway, the mrs woman came out of a back room because they were having lunch (oh dear, I disturbed them during lunch, is that a bad thing in Scotland?) so I said 'Does Pat work on a Saturday?' 'Yes' she said. (hooray she got it in one!)
So next question 'Can I make an appointment for Saturday 1st of April', hmmm.. that threw her a bit because she didnt '' yet. It had to do something with the diary not going that far. So she just scribbled 1st of April 10.00 somewhere and said '10.00' ok? Well.. I rather had 10.30 but wanted to avoid another confusion of tongues so left it. 'What's your last name' she said? 'Tanja' I said... DUHH!!!!!
So I made a joke and said she wouldn't want to say my last name, she might hurt herself while trying. Of course absolutely coming across as someone totally in control and not at all insecure of talking to people with a heavy Scottish accent who can't understand my English with heavy Dutch accent.
I can't remember making an appointment with the hairdresser in Holland being such an ordeal ;-)
On a brighter note, I missed only one word this time and she didn't have to ask me to repeat what I was saying once! Maybe I *will* get used to it one day....
I knew I had to do it soon...
So, I thought shall I call? Neh...
Maybe go by? hmmm...
What is better.. what will make me feel less embarrassed.. hard choice...lets bury it for a little while, there is time yet it still doesn't look too bad.
I could have gone on like that for months until this invitation arrived for a ...... P A R T Y ... !! Well.. the invitation wasn't necessarily for me, I am 'Tanja no mates' in this country but luckily John has a life :p-) and I get to go with him. He is so sweet!
With a P A R T Y to look forward to I didn't have any excuse left though, it just HAD to happen.
So, today in my lunch break instead of walking to the beach I walked to the 'shopping centre' of Wemyss Bay. I put this between apostrophes because the 'centre' consists of a Spar, a pharmacy, a hairdresser and a doctors surgery which is only sometimes open I think, luckily I seem to be quite healthy so haven't needed it yet except for horrible mandatory things which I shall spare you from.
Walking towards the centre I kept on practising with different sentences in my mind, trying to make sure that I am getting my message across and think of the moment when the reaction would come. I realised then that there are 2 potential moments where embarrassement might strike... when talking not being understood and when talked to not understanding.
The tension mounted while getting closer to THE moment until I finally arrived, had a bit of a dither if it really wasn't better to just use the telephone but decided that with the P A R T Y ahead I wanted to be sure that I would get an appointment and not be too late.
So... first hurdle, the door, there is this big HEAVY door which has a sign on it saying 'please hold door when closing it' or words to that effect. Of course I failed that hurdle and the door crashed closed behind me with a big bang!
Anyway, the mrs woman came out of a back room because they were having lunch (oh dear, I disturbed them during lunch, is that a bad thing in Scotland?) so I said 'Does Pat work on a Saturday?' 'Yes' she said. (hooray she got it in one!)
So next question 'Can I make an appointment for Saturday 1st of April', hmmm.. that threw her a bit because she didnt '
So I made a joke and said she wouldn't want to say my last name, she might hurt herself while trying. Of course absolutely coming across as someone totally in control and not at all insecure of talking to people with a heavy Scottish accent who can't understand my English with heavy Dutch accent.
I can't remember making an appointment with the hairdresser in Holland being such an ordeal ;-)
On a brighter note, I missed only one word this time and she didn't have to ask me to repeat what I was saying once! Maybe I *will* get used to it one day....
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Something new again!
We are doing so well!It is irritating really.. I just *have* to watch this 'You are what you eat' programme with this horrible Gillian McKeith. I just absolutely *hate* the way she bullies people and how she thinks that food addicted people 'just' change their diet to be eternally happy.
Well.. I tell you first hand that it doesn't work like that at all! If you are used to eating as your comfort blanket there is no way that a change of diet will save the day. Getting over an eating disorder is like getting over alcoholism. Just as dangerous as it is for an alcoholic to drink one drink, it is as dangerous for a foodie to eat. What makes dealing with a food addiction so difficult is that you have to eat. (thank goodness I say :-))
Anyway, as a recovering foodaholic I know where my problem areas are and how to stear away from them by always planning what to eat when and prevent getting hungry so I don't choose the wrong things at eating time. I always followed the healthy eating guidelines of a bit of bread/potatoes, fruit, vegetables, lean meat/fish and bit of fat.
And for years, that was considered THE healthy way to live. Now... when I watch these 'eat and live well' programmes, potato is considered too starchy, bread is a nono, fat and dairy is crap and the only way to go is fruit, vegetables, beans, nuts and seeds!
Now.. because of my eating issues I know that changing my diet instantly is certain to fail. So, what I have decided is to gently add the good things and take away the 'bad' things. As Ms McKeith always says 'try something new every week'.
A few weeks ago it was 'green lentils' (which surprised mr Presentnapper a lot, he could not imagine that someone did not know how to cook with lentils (the red ones I got sussed now ;-)) and if all goes well he is gonna teach me a bit about the green ones :-)))
Last week it was 'fennel'. Yeah I know.. probably again for normal people a normal vegetable but I had no clue what to do with it, found that it was really nice stir fried with onions and something else I can't remember.
This week it was 'Quinoa' and that is such lovely stuff I had to tell you about it..
They are apparently seeds (see the little excerpt of www.dictionary.com at the top) of the 'goosefoot' which look like little beads which when cooked fall into 2 bits it seems, little balls and spiral like bits. I know it doesn't sound really appetising but it is brilliant stuff.. it is very filling, full of protein and today I used it in the following soup recipe. (sorry, not for vegetarians unless there is a good alternative for bacon taste, and if so I would love to hear it!)
Ingredients:
bit of oil
1 onion in chunks
6 rashers of bacon
350 grams cauliflower in bits
1 leek in bits
handful of quinoa
stock cube and 600 ml water (ish)
Soften onions in a bit of oil. In the meantime cut 3 rashers into bits and add to onions for 2 minutes. Add cauliflower, leek and give a stir. Add the water and stock cube and cook for 20 minutes. At the same time in a separate pan cook the quinoa with plenty of water for 20 minutes.
Dry fry the other 3 rashers (or put in microwave between 2 sheets of kitchen paper for 3 mins) and cut in bits.
When time is up mash the vegetables with a blender, drain and add the quinoa
Put the bits of bacon and a bit of grated cheese on top.
Lovely!
Tuesday, March 07, 2006
So.... is it fair?
Interesting dilemma on the telly today...
Imagine this..
A woman has cancer and to make sure she doesn't get killed by it she needs to have her ovaries removed. The thought of never having a baby is something she can not deal with so she and her partner decide to freeze some embryos.
Now... the couple has split up and she is fighting in all courts available to be able to use them to get a baby but he doesn't want to have a baby with her anymore.
Phew!
Strangely enough I was in favour of the dad... I can imagine he does not want to have a child with someone he does not want to have any ties with. Being a divorced parent and seeing other divorced parents I can so empathise with that, it is the hardest thing in the world. If she would get their child, even if she promises to take all responsibilities from him, he would still know a child was put in the world with all emotional consequences that go with that.
John however immediately said 'well who cares, let her have the baby, why make such a fuss'.
That made me wonder.. is it a 'man/woman' view?
Do women zoom in on the emotional side of this and men on the practical?
What do you think?
Imagine this..
A woman has cancer and to make sure she doesn't get killed by it she needs to have her ovaries removed. The thought of never having a baby is something she can not deal with so she and her partner decide to freeze some embryos.
Now... the couple has split up and she is fighting in all courts available to be able to use them to get a baby but he doesn't want to have a baby with her anymore.
Phew!
Strangely enough I was in favour of the dad... I can imagine he does not want to have a child with someone he does not want to have any ties with. Being a divorced parent and seeing other divorced parents I can so empathise with that, it is the hardest thing in the world. If she would get their child, even if she promises to take all responsibilities from him, he would still know a child was put in the world with all emotional consequences that go with that.
John however immediately said 'well who cares, let her have the baby, why make such a fuss'.
That made me wonder.. is it a 'man/woman' view?
Do women zoom in on the emotional side of this and men on the practical?
What do you think?
Monday, March 06, 2006
Finally...
Goodness... my patience has been tested but today at 1800 hrs my thinkie was returned!
What was that about not knowing what you miss until it is gone?
Compared to the x20 I was working on this is absolute bliss!
Also means I now have to concentrate to do 'backup'!
:)
Any tips gratefully received (I have never backed anything up in my life due to my sunny outlook on life :-))
What was that about not knowing what you miss until it is gone?
Compared to the x20 I was working on this is absolute bliss!
Also means I now have to concentrate to do 'backup'!
:)
Any tips gratefully received (I have never backed anything up in my life due to my sunny outlook on life :-))
Sunday, March 05, 2006
Walkies
Phew! I get extra points for exercising today I tell you!
We went to the Clyde Muirshiel Park to 'do' the Greenock Cut!
It is only 10,5 km but I must say it feels a lot more because of the 'up and downing' that is involved, also the weather was very chilly even though my cheeks got burned from the wintersun!
It was absolutely brilliant though, the views are stunning no matter where you are on this walk, first the big Loch, then the views over Greenock, then walking all the way overlooking the A78 seeing where I lived and worked but against a backdrop of gorgeous hills and ending with a great waterfall full of icicles, gorgeous!
I can't stand up from the couch now without making a noise though, my muscles are really moaning!
We went to the Clyde Muirshiel Park to 'do' the Greenock Cut!
It is only 10,5 km but I must say it feels a lot more because of the 'up and downing' that is involved, also the weather was very chilly even though my cheeks got burned from the wintersun!
It was absolutely brilliant though, the views are stunning no matter where you are on this walk, first the big Loch, then the views over Greenock, then walking all the way overlooking the A78 seeing where I lived and worked but against a backdrop of gorgeous hills and ending with a great waterfall full of icicles, gorgeous!
I can't stand up from the couch now without making a noise though, my muscles are really moaning!
Saturday, March 04, 2006
PMA
= Positive Mental Attitude
Until Chico came on the scene I didn't even know that it had a name!
Years ago (in my 30s) someone told me that the road to happiness was to 'label positively'. It didn't mean anything to me at all but she taught me that every downside had an upside so if I said about myself 'I am so impatient' she would say 'yeah but that means you always get things done quickly'. Which is totally true!
She was applying some PMA, I know now :-)
It took a LONG while before I grasped the concept. It took a psychotherapist and then a relationship with a pseudopsychotherapist to get to a point of thinking that negativity certainly didn't get me anywhere except keeping me in confusing turmoil.
But when I finally did, people started calling me 'Pollyanna', compared me to a Labrador. Both of these labels were definitely not meant positively I tell you that!
(Aside... have you ever watched the film 'Pollyanna' which is about a girl who can always see the upside of things like when someone breaks their legs and can't get out of bed she would say 'but you can still sit here and look out of the window and see the sun shine' Hmm......)
Oprah (I am a BIG Oprah fan.. she does psycho babble in a nice way I think) told the world to start a 'gratitude journal' in which you had to write 5 positive things a day. Like.. I am grateful for the fact I am healthy, the sun shone today, my replacement laptop didn't break, dancing on ice is on and the hot cross buns were really nice.
Well.. I am not very good at journaling but it didn't leave my mind and in bed at night I sort of got into the habit of going through my day thinking of all the good bits that happened thus ignoring the negative bits.
I have, without realising this, developed this into a fine art.
*IF* ever anything negative happens I am SO quick to immediately think of the positive that I am sure that to some people who do not apply PMA in a fracture of second I must be SO irritating!
It has changed my life though, it is remarkable what happens if you concentrate on the positive and let the negative 'get a life'. Without watering it the negative seems to wither away and die.
So.. is happiness a way of thinking?
Discuss :-)
Until Chico came on the scene I didn't even know that it had a name!
Years ago (in my 30s) someone told me that the road to happiness was to 'label positively'. It didn't mean anything to me at all but she taught me that every downside had an upside so if I said about myself 'I am so impatient' she would say 'yeah but that means you always get things done quickly'. Which is totally true!
She was applying some PMA, I know now :-)
It took a LONG while before I grasped the concept. It took a psychotherapist and then a relationship with a pseudopsychotherapist to get to a point of thinking that negativity certainly didn't get me anywhere except keeping me in confusing turmoil.
But when I finally did, people started calling me 'Pollyanna', compared me to a Labrador. Both of these labels were definitely not meant positively I tell you that!
(Aside... have you ever watched the film 'Pollyanna' which is about a girl who can always see the upside of things like when someone breaks their legs and can't get out of bed she would say 'but you can still sit here and look out of the window and see the sun shine' Hmm......)
Oprah (I am a BIG Oprah fan.. she does psycho babble in a nice way I think) told the world to start a 'gratitude journal' in which you had to write 5 positive things a day. Like.. I am grateful for the fact I am healthy, the sun shone today, my replacement laptop didn't break, dancing on ice is on and the hot cross buns were really nice.
Well.. I am not very good at journaling but it didn't leave my mind and in bed at night I sort of got into the habit of going through my day thinking of all the good bits that happened thus ignoring the negative bits.
I have, without realising this, developed this into a fine art.
*IF* ever anything negative happens I am SO quick to immediately think of the positive that I am sure that to some people who do not apply PMA in a fracture of second I must be SO irritating!
It has changed my life though, it is remarkable what happens if you concentrate on the positive and let the negative 'get a life'. Without watering it the negative seems to wither away and die.
So.. is happiness a way of thinking?
Discuss :-)
Friday, March 03, 2006
This, ladies and gentlemen ....
....Is my 'favicon.ico'
So... if you go to http://www.elcalon.co.uk
You will see this in front of the link in your address bar.
BUT... it is also supposed to appear on my bookmark toolbar in Firefox when I add it.
And it is not. And it is driving me mental.
I have put the little file on the website and the fact that it is in front of the url means that it can find it. So WHY does it not want to show it on my task bar?
Any comments or advice HIGHLY appreciated!
Thursday, March 02, 2006
How to destroy a perfectly acceptable vegetable curry
Easy!!
Just prepare it, have a bit of a taster, look forward to the rest in the evening and then LET IT SIMMER FOR 3 HOURS WITH A LID ON WITHOUT REALISING IT.
By the time I finally thought 'gosh something smells funny' it had developed a few milimiter deep burnt crust and the rest had gone just dry. Pfff.....
It happens so often these days... and there are many excuses like 'the sun shone so bright so I couldn't see that the gas was still on' or 'I am doing too many things at once' and even though that is all true and valid....
.... I remember so clearly when I was a child that my family was talking about a poor old aunt who was getting more and more forgetful that they thought they had to put her into an old peoples home. I clearly hear one of my aunts say 'yes, it is really bad, she even forgot to turn off the gas and that is so dangerous, she could have hurt herself!'
Oh dear... I am so glad my child and other family are too far away to realise my decline :-D
Just prepare it, have a bit of a taster, look forward to the rest in the evening and then LET IT SIMMER FOR 3 HOURS WITH A LID ON WITHOUT REALISING IT.
By the time I finally thought 'gosh something smells funny' it had developed a few milimiter deep burnt crust and the rest had gone just dry. Pfff.....
It happens so often these days... and there are many excuses like 'the sun shone so bright so I couldn't see that the gas was still on' or 'I am doing too many things at once' and even though that is all true and valid....
.... I remember so clearly when I was a child that my family was talking about a poor old aunt who was getting more and more forgetful that they thought they had to put her into an old peoples home. I clearly hear one of my aunts say 'yes, it is really bad, she even forgot to turn off the gas and that is so dangerous, she could have hurt herself!'
Oh dear... I am so glad my child and other family are too far away to realise my decline :-D
Wednesday, March 01, 2006
Every cloud has a silver lining...
You know... it has been raining here for MONTHS literally. The streets never had a chance of drying up, puddles and mud everywhere. But.. it is something you sort of learn to live with when living in Scotland.But then.... when everywhere around us snow is falling, roads are closed and it is cold and miserable everywhere, this part of the world is absolutely stunningly beautiful.
It has been like this for 4 full days now.. I must say.. it does make up a little bit for all those grotty days!
One downside though.... I hope this spring cleaning urge revisits me soon since I don't want this spider thing to take over our house!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)